The land of opportunity

We all complain about this country once in a while but this is still the best country to live in. This gives country gives a poor person the most opportunity to rise up. If you study hard and work hard, you can rise from poverty. If you are in China, all the studying and working hard may still leave you in the lower end of the economic scale.

Unless you are a old guy....like me.

For a young person, education is easily gained here.

I've been reading study guides on SAT. My brain just can't seem to retain the information. I can't seem to motivate myself in the van to read these mundane texts. I end up just watching DVD's. I was parked in Chinatown one day and noticed I studied alittle more.

Not only am i fighting cold and physical weariness but my true problem is my mental health. It is really hard to read when your mentally depressed. I've noticed if I park my car in Chinatown or bring out the book at the laundry mat, I actually would read it.

Anyways, having a hard time here trying to prepare for the Compass test.

Oh yea about aiding your brother

So, the debate came up, If your family member just committed a major crime, would you aid him in to get away?

For me, the answer is an unwavering YES!

I'm his brother or father or Uncle...whatever, my job is to support and love my family members. I'm not the police. Its the police's job to catch him.

There is one factor that would make me turn him in. If i'm pretty sure, if my brother was loose, he would commit the crime again.

I'm not condoning killing. I'm 100% against any man killing another man. But that is a "action". Once that happens he is still my brother. If I turn him in, I've just killed my brother. He would be sent to prison or executed.

We all have roles to play. My role as a family member is to love another family member. Unconditionally.

Suppose my brother is very anti abortion. He bombs a clinic and kills someone. I maybe horrified and my personal views on abortion are different from his. His action is wrong. But he is still my brother. He killed a man. But i'm not about to kill my own brother for his evil act.

Would you aid your brother who just killed someone?

On Halloween night, A gunman pulled up next to a squad car and opened fired on 2 police officers. One of them died.

A month later, last Sunday, a man walks into a coffee shop and shoots dead 4 police officers. One of the officers was able to shoot the suspect in the stomach. Last night, after the most frenzied man hunt I've ever seen, the suspect was found by a stolen vehicle and shot dead by a lone police officer.

A few things I found amazing:

The suspect with a stomach gun shot wound was able to evade the police for 2 days.

The 2 coffee baristas working, immediately ran out of the coffee shop. When they looked back, they saw one of the officers struggling with the assaliant. The 2 baristas then jumped into their car and drove off! They drove off accross the street and asked a man to use his cell phone to call 911.

Are you kidding me? There are plenty of stores and people around that strip mall! They had to jump into their car to call for help? What abou alerting the people in the stores right next to them?

The police were able to quickly identify who they were looking for after 6 hours. The suspect was able to somehow get to seattle. The police surrounded a house in seattle. They are 100% he was in the house. They even had visual. Some how he excaped that house!

So he is on the loose. Somehow, he was spotted getting on a bus to UW. This black man's face has a big mole. He is very identifiable. He is also only 5'7". You telling me, he was able to get on a bus and exit a bus bleeding and all?

The police found allot of blood at a park. Surrounded the park and did not find him

They searched other buildings from tips and did not find him.

At 2:45 am. A lone officer saw a parked running vehicle. Determined it was stolen. Then he saw the suspect walking up and shot him.

This guy really had a lucky time eluding the police. Remember, his was a guy shot in the stomach bleeding to death.

Which side of the table?

Yesterday, I'm taking off my work clothe. Taking off the double layer of thermals, double socks and changing into a pair of guess jeans and a nice shirt ....just to go take a shower! And it dawned upon me. I feel like I'm a actor in a play or something. Changing my costume for the next scene. Why do we as people do these simple things just for the pleasure of others when they see us? odd

So, I finally bought a good vacuum cleaner off Craiglist. I used this email address to ask about the vacuum cleaner and well as fate has it, the man is Asian and his name is David. He of course became curious. I would be too if some guys email was homelessxxxxxx. I agreed to meet him at his Church. I was amazed at the large crowd of Asians going to the same Church. I had a nice chat with David and took all the little pamphlets and goodies people thrusted at me. That night, I actually read the church pamphlets. And as it turns out, this David, is in charge of the Church's monthly activity of feeding the homeless under a bridge in Seattle.

A guy who is in charge of feeding the homeless from a Asian church randomly puts an item for sale and is responded by a homeless Asian...........Sounds way too neat, but it is true. hmmmmm.

So immediate reaction, I'm going to go join this merry group of church people and help them feed the homeless.

Then a interesting situation came up before I went to sleep. I could actually be fit on either side of the table. I could feed or be a feedee. So which side of the table do I belong? Should I be serving or feeding? I guess I could be on both sides. But which side is the true me.

The answer was obvious. I belong on the side being fed. Its not that I want something for free. But the people serving the homeless are not there just to fill the stomachs of the homeless. The homeless will be hungry again in a few hours. They come to serve the food to practice compassion.
The spiritual act is bigger than than deed.....I would not be doing it for the same reason.

Besides, I'm homeless. I'm not homeless homeless, but noneoftheless, a stuggling human being.

And if you ask me, I feel more comfortable on the homeless people side. But the goal is someday be more comfortable will the "normal" people.

Good bye for now son

I've decided to cut off everything with the crazy woman who has my son. Thus, it also cuts me off with my son. No more phone calls. Nothing. It hurts allot. But nothing I'm not used to.

Your mother is adament on visiting Vietnam. I've been pushing her for years to visit Vietnam with you. You need to learn a native language. To see there is a land that people accept the way you look. Salt lake City....not the most diverse in the world.

Look at the crazy scenerio that is happening.....

Your mom is going to use up her savings for the visit.
She plans to for at least 6 months. What about coming back to make money?
When you two return, there is no job or money in her savings.

While you two are there, I'm suppose to give her money to live.
I am currently homeless.
I have less than $1000 in savings.
There is a looming flood in Kent at our warehouse that may put me unemployed.
What is I lose my job or get injured while you two are in Vietnam?

So I spoke to a couple of Vietnamese people. They told me a single woman and a boy traveling alone is very dangerous in Vietnam. Especially, your mom doesn't even know where you two will be staying.

Even with all these things stating its a bad idea, I still decided I can support it.. On one condition, Your mom have her brother call me and convince me you will be safe. Because your mom is not the brightest person in the world and her past history tells me here statements are usually false.

Well, she became more infuriated and refuse to have your uncle call me. That's all I want. Some way to be assured when you goto vietnam, you'll be living with relatives. Not in a apartment randomly rented. Its a communist country for God sakes. And I still haven't found another vietnamese person who tell me a single Americanized woman will be safe running around by herself.

Your mom gave me the ultimatum"You support me on this trip or you don't talk to your son no more"

"Fine, You cannot use are son as a pawn in our arguements. If that is case than so be it"

I called her back and told her "We are done. We are through"

I've tried and gave everything but enough is enough. I think the future will be brighter if there is a complete break. 100% no contact.

Son, I don't expect you to understand. Understanding or not, is trivial. You don't care and should have to care about all this. All you want is to have a normal life with a father, mother and people who can show you life and love. God, I hope you turn out better than me and you mother have.

The true reason I love a haircut

What a freaken disappointing day! Fuck, I think I"m actually a little peeved. I woke up this morning excited. Anticipating my haircut. Actually, I don't go for the haircut. I go to get a shampoo.

I always goto this vietnamese barber/school in Chinatown. The haircut is $6 and the shampoo is $2. The shampoo is usually such a treat! A nice vietnamese girl who speaks little English will shampoo. She massaged your head. Her body is inches from your face. You can't help but smell the scent from her body. And she usually massages your forehead. And conditioner is also massaged. The most wonderful feeling ever. All for 2 dollars! Well worth the price! And for me, its been over a year since I've had any human physical contact. I have to goto get a haircut once in a while to get my human contact on! lol

Well today, the barber is some woman I"ve never seen. She is all professional. The usual shampoo session that lasts 15 minutes only took her 5 minutes. There was no massaging. Shampoo, rinse, conditioner, rinse and show me the money. Sigh........

The Office

Its been a while since I"ve written. Its because of a new addiction....The Office. I've never seen the tv show before. The latest Netflix selections hasn't been been too appealing. So I took a chance and rented what appeared to be a popular tv show on Netflix.

Strange, I find myself happy in the last month. I find myself smiling and laughing out loud sometimes. Memory of insane scenes from the tv show creep into my days.

I don't know how it reflects my weak state of personality but a tv show has actually influence my mood. I"ve been depressed, sad, angry. There is not many things to cheer me up. And then came The Office.

I find myself not as upbeat on the days I'm waiting for a new dvd. So I find myself pirating episodes off the internet. I"m halfway through season 5 now. And now a new fear has creeped in.

I love this new euphoria of good feelings during the day. What will happen when there are no more new episodes? I find myself futifully trying to limite myself to only 1 new episode a day. Trying to prolong the dreaded day when I've caught up to the current state of the tv show.